Chronicles of the Last Hour, Book 1: Post XV:
Chief, I have been thinking of late, and I cannot get my mind off of Eric. I think I have fallen in love with him. And I cannot do my job satisfactorily. Please, reassign me to somewhere far away where I can start my life over, and find myself again.
You, Officer, Patty, will work with Eric from now on. I have decided to make you his 24 hour/ 7 day a week body guard. And if that means you fuck him, be my guest. Your job is to make sure he stays safe. It is a national security issue of paramount importance. And in such close proximity with this one you now think you love so much, you will finally see if there really is something there or if it was all imagined by you.
You are placing me with him, knowing my heart and how I feel about him?
Get over it, Officer Patty. You are an Officer of the Law, not some high school girl. Now, get over your crushes and do your duty. And if that means you fuck him, then fuck him. Amen.
Do you know if a girl fucks Eric, Eric is to lose his gift of prophecy, Chief?
What is that to me? If that makes him weaker, then by all the means fuck that dude and take away that gift. Be our Delilah against that Samson, and you will be given anything you want in my power to grant. That is a promise. Amen.
Say if I get him to fuck me, and he loses all those powers, do I get to keep him, or do you take him away from me?
Make him powerless like everyone else, and I guarantee you, lover of Eric, that he is your man. Amen. But you will be the only one assigned to protect that jackass. So make sure you really want him badly before you take a bullet for him.
Who actually is trying to kill him, Chief?
Oh you do not know, do you? Father Dave Heney has put a bounty on his head. He has basically assured the one who slays Eric a guaranteed pass for avoiding purgatory. How can you beat that, sister?
How did he think that one up? And who exactly would buy it, the Mafia? I guess if you are Catholic, it might make sense. But what actually does he give them? A certificate with Dave Heney’s signature on them?
Actually, Father Dave Heney has established his own mint and is in the process of minting coin. If you buy the gold coin, you get a million years off of your purgatory in indulgences. If you buy the silver coin, you get a thousand years of indulgences. And if you buy the copper coin, you get a whole year off of purgatory, plus a calendar featuring Dave Heney’s face, with each day complete with its devotions, each hand signed by Father Dave Heney himself. Amen. And if you buy the steel coin, you get ten solid weeks of indulgences off of your record in heaven. And if you buy the wooden coin you get one whole day off of your suffering in purgatory.
Understand that each coin is really made of clay and is coated with a fake metallic or synthetic wooden paint finish to make it appear truly real and authentic. And the clay used at its base is genuine clay that comes directly from Father Dave Heney’s childhood home. And whenever anyone buys an indulgence from Dave Heney, they get a life size poster of Dave Heney himself to put on their front door. Plus, they get a bumper sticker, featuring Dave Heney leading the entire Church to heaven.
Dave Heney is so fucking proud of his work, that he has written a new book, entitled: How to Sell Indulgences Correctly Without Alarming the Protestants: A step by step guide each priest and pastor needs to know on how to milk the faithful of their hard earned cash and make them think they are actually getting something back in return that has any actual value at all.
And buried in page 666 are these words by Father Dave Heney himself:
Never just take or seize the tithe without giving back junk and claiming it to be an equal exchange. For remember the wisdom of our forefathers involved in the robbing of Africa of its human labor force. We did not simply just march into Black Africa and start conquering Black nations and exporting niggers. No, we brought trinkets with us, such as mirrors and candies. And we brought plenty of rum. For remember the famous sayings:
- Give a nigger his rum and he will give you his neighbor. Amen.
- Never waste time going nigger hunting when there are plenty of niggers willing to hunt down good quality niggers for you, while working for a slave’s ration for that day’s work. Amen.
- And remember the paradigm: We who are the White elite get all the women and all the sex and all the food. Then descending down the pecking order, we have the Negro slave at the bottom. He belongs at the bottom so that we can belong at the top. He has to be whipped regularly to maintain discipline. And it is always sexually arousing to watch the women react to every blow of the whip on the Black man’s back.
- For remember, we whip Black men not just to maintain discipline and fear, but to also sexually enjoy the experience of a Black whipping. If you have never experienced a Black whipping, you do not know true sexual enjoyment. And we put women right up front to witness the curling of the Black man’s flesh with each stroke of the whip. And our White dicks get hard as we watch the women writhe in agony as they throb in sexual delight at each thrashing the Black man receives in their sight. Amen.
- But whenever you find someone like Eric in your fold, get rid of him quickly. For thinkers, like Eric, are enemies to Nazi sympathizers and leaders like me, Dave Heney, Master of Catholicism. Whenever you find someone actually trying to put to practice the teachings of Jesus, get rid of him quickly. For the Church was made for sinners and not for saints. Hence, when you enter the Church, you should expect to find sin there, not saintliness. Amen. A Church full of sin and sinners is my kind of Church. And until Saint Bruno Catholic Church becomes the brothel it was meant to be, complete with the transformation of the convent into a whorehouse, so that any boy needing to know how to fuck a woman can approach a nun, and with a fist full of dollars, and come to know that nun’s pussy and be taught by her just how to make pussies ejaculate. Amen.
- Imagine the service we do for women. The nuns, who prior to this transformation, were basically debt slaves to the Church, now have a fully functional money source, right between their legs. And the Church now can dip their fingers into the nuns’ private parts and know whether their consecrated work force are really doing their part to serve the Church. For remember this verse:
When semen is seen flowing from the consecrated woman’s cunt,
That means Father Dave Heney is busy setting up his Millennial Kingdom.
- And finally, Father Dave Heney is a tired man. He has labored long and hard to fulfill his dream of making every man able to fuck whomever he so pleases. For Father Dave Heney is in league with Satan to corrupt the Catholic Church.
For I am Dave Heney, expert on how Church and society are to be run. I am making my own rum with a picture of me rescuing the Black women from the Black men. Then there is the followup picture where I fuck the Black women in the sight of the Black men to rub it in that I, Dave Heney, am superior to all you niggers! For we, the White elite, must always maintain discipline. And I alway try to relive the joy I had in my first Black women fuck. I was serving in the Ku Klux Klan at the time and we White men were teaching some Black niggers a lesson. So I looked the Black insolent rebel in the eyes and said, He thinks he has the right to speak back at us, let’s get his wife and his daughters, and let each of us thrust our manhood into their throbbing pussies in his sight, so that he knows his place from now on. Amen. And that is what I did. And I will never forget the look on his face as he saw me ejaculate on his wife and daughters and watched my cum flow down her face and drip down her naked breasts, to the cheering of the White man. Amen. That is the official Father Dave Heney way to discipline the Black man.
And that reminds me. Before I close this post, let me advertise my new book, entitled: Follow Dave Heney, and you will master how to kick Black but and fuck Black cunt. Amen.
And let me make the official Father Dave Heney pronouncement: Father Dave Heney says: Let all Black men yield their backs to the White man’s whip. And let all Black women yield their pussies to the White man’s dick. Amen.
Any questions? Well I don’t have time to answer them. For I have to go fuck some alter boys, and then I must fuck my hot new secretary, and then I must go fuck Joe Biden, for he is guest of honor at my house. And at each meeting we give each other head.
Remember the Dave Heney Mantra: Keep the Black Niggers down! And keep the White cock in their mothers and sisters’s cunts. Amen.
I, Father Dave Heney, Master of Saint Bruno Catholic Church, have spoken. Amen.